We are not Meant to be?

I am beginning to annoy myself again...
I am irritated with his constantly changing MSN nicks and pics.

Initially it was: it's complicated
Then: you're beautiful
Now: I WILLbe watching over u...

Maybe I am over-reacting or too sensitive over these small gestures but that's the immediate feeling and vibe I get from him. I believe in my intuition and 6th sense because they never fail me. Before our nightly MSN conversations, his nicks were neutral and I refer to them as meaningless. Too much of coincidences, everytime I changed my nick to something emotional, he will respond with similar tactics. Once I updated my MSN picture to me and my cousin, his individual picture (always he, himself alone) becomes a picture of him and his friend. That's when I feel he does take attention of me on MSN.

I always wanted to question the significance of his current nick but I know I may not get my desired answer so why risk it? He can simply said it's a song title or I find some gal cute... In the end, it's me who gets so frustrated for asking that dumb question. Besides, my conversations with him are leading to nowhere. Now I am so not motivated to talk to him because he will keep telling he is Sianz, siAnz and more SiAnz. How am I supposed to carry on like this?

Yeah... I seriously think I have superb endurance as a Taurean but he is getting on my nerves somehow. Does he like me or not? Pat said he likes me definitely and I so wanna believe it too BUT the manner he treats me, it doesn't seem to give me a clue on his behaviour. She also mentioned that it is not worth it to trouble myself over this Pisces guy because she doubts he is my The One. I dunno if he is my The One, maybe yes maybe no but I do look forward to the beginning of every relationship hopefully.

He loses interest and concentration easily on things and people. There is a high possibility of him losing me too. However, Pat is afraid of me losing interest in him after he confessed he likes me? That is so ironic... haha. In the end, I may be the one with the broken heart instead. I think I am very empty, I just wanna to learn to love and be loved at least once. I really wonder how I would behave in a love relationship?

It's interesting how things started off between him and me. Sparks fly off and died off fast. I hope this is not the case for us. I am sincere to try it out with him because I feel that I can learn alot from him. The encounter with him gives me courage to face myself and other guys. I became a person who no longer view pride as a big issue. I really hate it when fate allows me to meet such a guy and gives us a fading away ending.

The previous relationship was the same.
I met Lunz. Lunz likes me. I acted as though I don't care. I like Lunz. Lunz don't like me. The end. However I am grateful that I met Lunz before this Pisces guy because now I know how to handle such situations better with more considerations.

Me and him? What will come out of it? I don't want to expect because I don't want to face disappointments again. If we are meant to be then we will be. Surprisingly, I never thought of giving up even though he may not like me. I would rather it just disappear gradually than to put an abrupt full stop to the entire story.